Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Today has been a good day....

Some days just seem to flow better than others. Today has been one of those days. We started the day after taking the kids to school, having coffee at our local coffee shop, enjoying the regulars, which I guess that includes us. It's great just hanging out with my husband, and quite frankly I could get used to this night schedule. Although, there are some definite drawbacks, which we won't get into here, but I'm sure I'll be glad to have him back in the evenings. It is nice to be able to run errands together, though. So we looked at new cell phones today, and that always makes me happy, the prospect of something new, went to the gun store to get stuff for Andrew's new gun, and then stopped off for some groceries. This is huge, these are things we rarely ever did together because of a traditional work schedule.
My day has also been good for many other reasons. Mostly just because of sheer busyness, I've had things to do to take my mind off the hard stuff. I write this knowing that some of you are reading this thinking, "huh, what hard stuff", well until recently quite frankly I've felt like I keep this blog for myself. I would rarely get comments and really just thought nobody read it. Well in the past couple weeks, not only have I been writing more, people have been commenting more. Not just on the blog either, I had someone come up to me and church on Sunday and make a comment, I won't name any names, but it begins with a B, you know who you are. Anyway, having this knowledge that people are actually reading what I write, is both scary and good at the same time. For one, it just makes me think a little more about what I put down, but it also makes me a little guarded in what I write. Is what I write going to directly effect anyone in particular, should I have said that, it's all these fears of what other people think that made me turn to a blog in the first place. I figured, "hey, no ones going to read this thing, and it's a little more fun than writing in a journal". The thing is, I can't let fear guide my writings, or my life for that matter. A wise friend once told me that I need to write, where ever, whatever, without judgement. If that is on a blog or in a journal, I need to be able to write not only without judging myself, but without the fear of others judging me. So from here on out I am going to write, whatever I feel like. If it offends someone, then by all means let me know and I'm sorry in advance. If what I write worries you, well know that this is a place of solace for me, it's where I can vent and not worry about hurting any one's feelings. I am writing for myself, because I have to, because it's like air to me and without it I would drown.

2 comments:

b said...

I'll stop reading if you wise. I'l (try) to stop commentings if you wise. I in no way what you to change the way you write because I'm reading. This is your solice and I in no way want to take that from you. Just let me know what you wise.

Leigh Lear said...

I wrote this just for you, by no means do I want you to stop reading, I just had to find a way to include you.:)